Balance

I realize I am not considered a "working professional" but I feel like one. The biggest difference is that I am PAYING to do this rather than getting payed. But I still wake up at 6am, leave the house by 7am, and don't get home until 4:30, and am exhausted when I get home.

It is becoming apparent to me that I need to work at balancing my life. This includes times of rest, times of work and times of play. Though I really don't feel like doing laundry when I get home, I should. If I do a little bit of work around the house each day, it wont pile up all week long. Otherwise I have 5 or 6 hours of work left for me saturday. This takes away from my weekend time to relax and enjoy time with friends and family.

I am living alone right now, and with this comes good and bad things. It is nice to be able to take a nap or do whatever I would like, not having to worry about anyone else's schedule. But at the same time I do get lonely. I am much less likely to fix myself a good meal, and much more likely to put off housework, as I don't mind seeing the mess. I look forward to the day when I have a family to take care of and to help take care of me. But for now I think I will work on taking care of myself and my house.

Love

The more I am getting to know these students, the more I love them. Don't get me wrong, there are times when I get so frustrated with some i almost rip my hair out. But all in all, I care for them.

I am starting to see strengths and weaknesses in each one of them, and find my self contemplating ways to teach them even during my down time. I have various activities or items that remind me of my students even when I am away from them. And of course, I have nightmares about all the things that could go wrong while I am teaching.

They are a part of my life. I think this is an aspect of teaching I have never really thought about before. I have always looked forward to impacting them, and my students impacting me- But they are a part of me, a part of who I am, a part of my daily life. This means we share something- whether we want to or not. :-) I hope that what I share with them is a positive experience for them- not just something to get through.

Through the business of the school day I often forget about feelings and relationships. I have been trying to just breathe a few times a day- and take a look at each student and think about how wonderfully God has made them, and the gift that they are in my life.

I love these kids.

Decisions decisions!

I have always been told that the best tool for a teacher to have, is to be prepared. But I am quickly learning that no matter how long I spend planning, or predicting or preparing, I can never be 100% ready for what will happen.

I am astounded at the number of decisions I have to make throughout the day- it is almost constant. Where should I set these papers? What should I do with this extra 2 minutes before library? Should I let Jason go to the bathroom now? Or should I make him finish his math first? Should I get upset over that remark I just heard Jane say about Amanda? Or should I let it go? Can I let them work on this in partners? Should I use the whiteboard to explain this or is verbal instruction enough? Josh has been in the bathroom for a long time, should I send someone to go check on him?

Being a teacher is exhausting. Some studies even put teaching in the top ten most stressful professions. I understand why!

Though I want to fall over on the couch each day when I get home, and I take a two hour nap 4 out of 5 days, I love it.

I am learning so much, and the more i encounter these decisions, the easier they are becoming to make.